On My Mind: Natural Hair (It's Kind of a Big Deal)

Thursday, January 19, 2012


This video below depicts how far we've come in the black community as it pertains to black women and natural hair but allow me to elaborate: 


The Past
Back in 2004 I decided to stop relaxing my hair.  Those first couple of years were very difficult for me because for one, my whole image changed so getting used to a "new me" really took some time, and two, my own people (mainly the older ones) weren't as accepting.  I would always hear things like "Why would you do that?" "You had such pretty hair!"   "I could never go natural my hair is too nappy!"  So at that point it was no longer about me dealing with my own insecurities about my hair but now I felt like I had to prove to the older   black women that our natural hair is just as pretty or prettier than our chemically processed hair.


Fast forward a few years:
I became obsessed in the online natural hair community trying to learn everything possible about my "new head of hair", and during that time, I started noticing that commercials and print ads were only using black women with natural hair.  I rarely saw a black woman with relaxed hair in tv commercials.  It was as if the white community accepted who we truly were more than our own community.  Slowly but surely, more online natural hair communities started popping up, I started noticing more women on the street with natural hair, Target started carrying natural hair care products (which was huge), friends and family members started growing their relaxers out, and those negative comments that  I had received in my earlier years turned into compliments -"Oooh how did you do that?"  "Your hair is so pretty!" "Will my hair do that?"  So I finally felt like I started to change the perception of what natural hair was to the women in my life.  But then comes a whole other issue, the black men.   I would often wonder what they saw when they looked at me or any other woman with natural hair for that matter.  Lucky for me, my husband was very accepting of my decision to go natural (some husbands aren't).   I would ask him from time to time his opinion about natural hair and his answer has always been this: "When a woman is natural, she looks like herself and it shows a sense of confidence.  It allows you to see who you really are and not what the world wants you to be."



The Present



About a month ago I was watching MTV Jams (because I still watch music videos) and this new video came on by Tabi Bonney called Feeling More ft. Nicole Wray.   Most of the women in the video were natural!  That never happens!  It was as if he was saying "I recognize you and your true beauty".  Watching this video made me realize how far the black community has come in embracing our natural hair, and it made me proud.  There is an ongoing debate on if natural hair is a fad or if it's here to stay.  I personally feel like natural hair isn't going anywhere and relaxers will soon be a thing of the past.   We understand how to care for our kinky hair more than we ever have before,  which makes it easier for more women to go natural, plus, there is a strong support system out there that we can now rely on. It's an exciting time for black women as it pertains to our image in this society and I'm just glad to see it come full circle.  I digress...

    pinterest


14 comments:

  1. Wow, Tori, really great post! First, I love the video and the song. Second, I find it inspiring that you went against the grain and embraced your natural hair. I could actually take a lesson from you as I sat in a salon for four hours getting a Brazilian Blow-out in November. (Kind of like a relaxer, but not as intense?) The things we do for beauty! Your post reminds me of the movie Good Hair by Chris Rock. I only saw previews and Rock doing interviews for the movie, but it looked funny (and really insightful).

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  2. @theresa- isn't it a great song and video? I've heard of the Brazilian blow-out but didn't know it takes 4 hours! Sheesh! I'm so glad my salon days are over. The Chris Rock movie was definitely hilarious and insighful!

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  3. Wow Tori, this was so interesting to read - I had no idea about some of the issues surrounding this and it was interesting to read about your own journey about the way you wear your hair! I personally love the natural look and as a girl with fin, pin-straight hair I get jealous of hair that does the complete opposite of mine (hanging limply)! I love your husband's comment, how wonderful that he is so loving and supportive!

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  4. So I admit that I am not black, but as a curly haired girl, I have a great appreciation for this post - there's something about letting your hair go natural that's pretty gosh darn freeing. And life got a heck of a lot easier when I let that happen. Thanks for sharing!

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  5. @Jadyn-Natural hair has always been an intriguing topic for us. I'm glad you found it interesting. So glad my husband has been supportive throughout my natural hair journey he really helped me out A LOT!

    @Chrystina-I have to agree with you, life did get a lot easier and though I never had insecurities with my appearance before I have to admit that since I've been natural It has given me an extra boost of confidence!

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  6. Hi Tori, I really enjoyed this post and along with Jadyn wasn't aware of natural v relaxed hair issues. I love natural hair and am definitely envious of those styles you posted on pinterest. They look sassy, fun and so cool. Oh for a bit of hair ooomph!

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  7. Great post Tori! My sister and I both went natural back in 2003, and we have never regretted that decision. I have people stop me everyday and tell how much they love my hair!

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    1. Thanks girl! It's funny right?!? I get more compliments now about my hair than I ever have before!

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  8. Love your Pinboard!! This is the second time I've stopped relaxing my hair. I can see the difference in my own family's acceptance of it from the reactions the first time and now. It may be because I shocked them all when I big chopped rather suddenly, lol. The first time I had grown it out slowly. My paternal grandmother was flabbergasted then, she's from the south and to her way of thinking if you have hair that can grown long, it should stay long and straight. When it was short this time I think she actually liked it.

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    1. Awww she's coming around! I think that's one of the most important things about natural hair, getting older folks to see the beauty in it!

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  9. i'm glad you embraced your natural hair. you are beautiful!

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  10. I definitely find natural hair's increasing popularity encouraging. I have been natural for 8 years, and have never seen so many women embracing their natural hair in the media and on the street. Has anyone seen the Dead Prez video, "Beauty Within?" It's all about black women and natural hair.

    I think the black community has come a long way with their treatment and preference for natural hair. Slowly, but surely, the media is, too. I dedicated my entire blog to the way that women with natural hair are depicted in the media because I was noticing it everywhere: from music videos to newspaper articles to commercials and advertisements.

    Great post!

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  11. and with this post (and oldie but goodie), I just added you to the top of my list of blogs I'm reading this week.

    So real, so fresh. love your take on this.

    Berndette
    www.b3hd.blogspot.com

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